Before we make our final decision on your application, we would like a revised personality section.
As it is, the personality section goes into detail on his recklessness, but is sparse on other aspects of Magnus' personality (for example, his dead wife being mentioned only briefly when that would affect/motivate him in multiple ways). We like that Magnus' evolution as a character has been mentioned, but we don't feel we've gotten enough information about who he is currently. Particularly given his post-ending canonpoint, we would like more details about the kind of person he's grown into by the conclusion of his story, and who he is as he enters the game.
You will have one week to complete these requests before the character is available again.
REVISIONS
As it is, the personality section goes into detail on his recklessness, but is sparse on other aspects of Magnus' personality (for example, his dead wife being mentioned only briefly when that would affect/motivate him in multiple ways). We like that Magnus' evolution as a character has been mentioned, but we don't feel we've gotten enough information about who he is currently. Particularly given his post-ending canonpoint, we would like more details about the kind of person he's grown into by the conclusion of his story, and who he is as he enters the game.
You will have one week to complete these requests before the character is available again.